"All About My Mom and Dad"- A lesson about love

As part of our history curriculum the kids are learning to keep their own histories by writing in a journal regularly. At least three times per week I sit down with each of the kids and ask them about a particular topic. They narrate, I write, they illustrate. Aside from being a great keepsake (and hopefully a lifelong habit of journaling), it has been a wonderful opportunity for quality one-on-one time.

Earlier this week, I asked the kids to tell me a little about themselves. Yesterday I asked them to tell me a little about their mom and dad. It was a wonderfully sweet (and eye opening) experience to listen to them share their thoughts about their dad and I. With their permission, I'd like to share some of those thoughts. I should probably mention before I begin that we did our journal writing right before dinner which may account for the constant mention of food from every single one of them (I highly doubt it is because I am such a superb cook. . .I'm really not!).

Alayna: My dad makes fries and pizza. Sometimes he makes sandwiches for lunch. He vacuums. He takes me to the potty at night. He takes me to the park. He runs errands. My dad goes to work. Before he goes he gives us hugs and sings, "So Long, Farewell." He goes to the store to buy food. My mom takes me to Philadelphia. Soon I will get my prosthetic there. Sometimes she goes to meetings. She takes me to the potty. She makes breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday. She takes me to the doctor. My mom loves me. She tucks me in at night. She makes gluten-free pizza. She cleans the house. She is helping me write my history.

Alexis: My daddy goes to work. He gives me hugs and sings me songs. He takes me to McDonalds. He takes me to the store. My mom goes to the store. Mommy makes breakfast, lunch and dinner. Mommy helps me with schoolwork and reads to me. She watches "Phineas and Ferb" with me. Mommy gives me hugs and kisses.

Evan: I love my dad. He takes good care of me. He helps me get dressed. He earns money. I love to run errands with my dad. I love my mom. I love her cooking. I love her because she takes good care of me. I love her because she helps me go potty. I love her because she helps me get dressed and she feeds me. She helps me do schoolwork.

Maren: My dad plays baseball with me. He takes me on errands. He makes yummy waffles on Saturday. He plays Hide-n-seek with me. He's in love with my mom. Mommy makes eggs, muffins and pancakes. Mommy teaches me math. Mommy helps me with my worksheets. Mommy gives me baths. I like to read and do school with mommy. Mommy makes smoothies. I love mommy and daddy.

Lukas: My dad is cute. He makes me smile. I love my dad. My dad plays with me all the time. He goes to work to earn money. My dad teaches me that sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do. My mom is cute. She teaches me lots of lessons. I love my mom. I like to do school with her. I also like her cooking.


Jacob: I like my dad because he plays baseball with me. Daddy plays games with me. Daddy goes to work. He earns money and helps raise money for our babies. Mommy makes yummy pizza. She makes me smile (Daddy makes me smile too). She makes yummy homemade fries. I like to play games with my mom. I like to hang out with her too. She makes pretty things for our house. She says prayers with me.

Joshua was "too tired" to share his thoughts with me yesterday so I will have to share them another time. Lily isn't quite ready to narrate her thoughts yet, but she lets us know how she feels about mommy and daddy in other ways (she loves to look through picture albums and point out all of the pictures of mommy and daddy. . .this is HUGE for her).


It was very interesting to see what was important to each of our children. It was particularly interesting to see how much our older adopted children (who came to us at 3.5, 7, 7 and 8) focused their thoughts on basic necessities (food, clothing, toileting, hugs and kisses), needs that often went unmet in their previous situations (Evan especially). Our biological children (who have never had to go without the basic necessities) focused their thoughts more on activities, quality time and relationships.

What a blessing it was to get such an intimate look into how our children see us. As always, I am humbled by the simplicity of their unconditional love (and their willingness to overlook our MANY faults) and I am reminded that it is the little things that matter most to our little people. They are watching us ("Daddy is in love with my mom"), they DO listen to us ("My dad teaches me that sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do") and EVERYTHING we do matters to them! Once again, I tip my hat to my children for teaching me the most valuable lessons in life.

The Readers Digest version

On January 1st I boarded a plane, bound for Bulgaria, to bring our daughter Alexis home. What I didn't realize then was that I was actually boarding the crazy train, destination not in sight :-) Since that fateful day, we have been on one wild ride. At some point I hope to go back and chronicle each adventure in detail, but for now, I give you the "Readers Digest" version of the last 4 months:

I spent January 1st-7th in Bulgaria, finalizing our daughter, Alexis', adoption. If you are just joining in on the fun, you can read all about it here.

Alexis and I arrived home on January 8th, which also happened to be Richard and Joshua's birthday (best birthday present ever, right?)! We celebrated a few days later, but unfortunately it appears that my camera was not invited to the party, because there is not a single picture in existence!

Daddy and Joshua (Easter 2011)

Doctors appointments, post placement reports, homestudy updates, playing catch up with school and adjusting to life with a new family member, consumed the next two weeks. If you're hoping for more details about this period of our lives you might want to start praying for a miracle because it was such a blur that I am having trouble remembering anything other than the fact that we all came out alive!

On January 22nd, our triplets, Maren, Lukas and Jacob, celebrated their 6th birthday! Can you believe that it was only six years ago that our adventures in parenthood began!? To say that the Lord has given us an increase might be a bit of an understatement ;-) Furthermore, can you believe that in just six years our tiny babies have grown from this:






Into this:




How I love this crazy trio of energy, intelligence, compassion, laughter and Christ-like love! More evidence of how much my Father in Heaven loves me!

On January 26th, Alayna and I loaded up the car and headed to Philadelphia for surgery. . . .in the middle of a blizzard! Everything was smooth sailing until we reached West Virginia, then the snow began. The next 10+ hours involved white knuckles, 30 mile per hour speeds and lots of adrenaline. At one point, we were even sideswiped by a semi (and I might have peed my pants just a little!). BUT, 13 hours after leaving home, we arrived at our destination, slightly terrified and extremely tired, but in one piece!

On January 27th Alayna had her right leg amputated through the knee and a tenotomy on her left foot (this is one of those topics that I plan to expound upon in the future, but remember, we still have 3 months of adventure to cover). Two days later she was discharged from the hospital and we began the trek back home, this time, in much calmer weather!

Alayna's right leg and left foot before surgery

Another view of her right leg before

Alayna's right leg and left foot after surgery

Less than 24 hours after surgery she is unphased and wishing I would leave her alone so that she could listen to her music

Two weeks after Alayna's surgery I returned to Philadelphia, this time with all 8 kids in tow, for a post-surgical follow-up appointment for Alayna, as well as appointments for Joshua and Evan. As I was changing the dressing on Alayna's leg the night before her appointment, I noticed that her incision had dehisced (that's fancy for, "the surgical incision had opened up"). Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) this was not the first time that we had experienced wound dehiscence, so I knew immediately that we were likely in for a real "treat"! After examining the wound, the doctor sent us home with the necessary supplies to apply wet-to-dry dressings 2-3 times per day and we scheduled a follow-up appointment for two weeks later.

The kids and I returned to Philadelphia 2 weeks later. The wound had continued to open but it WAS healing so I was given instructions to continue the wet-to-dry dressings and return again in two weeks.

Outside of the Ronald McDonald House of Southern New Jersey-Our home away from home

So, two weeks later, the kids and I returned to Philadelphia again. At this point the wet-to-dry dressings were not keeping the wound moist enough (despite how often I changed the dressing) and we had reached a plateau in the healing process. Several wound care specialists were called in to look at Alayna's leg and together we came up with a new plan. Unfortunately, this plan involved an extended stay in Philadelphia. What I thought would be a routine trip of 2-3 days had suddenly turned into 2 weeks. . . .by myself, with 8 kids, totally unprepared :-) Have I mentioned how much I love a good adventure!? Fortunately, Richard happened to be on a business trip in Washington DC and he and his dad spent a day gathering needed "supplies" that they sent with my mother in-law to drop off for us on her way to visit my sister in-law in New York (did you catch all that?).

We know how to make ourselves at home in small hospital exam rooms :-)

Truth be told, other than the initial stress of learning that we would be staying for 2 weeks, not two days and trying to figure out all of the logistics (specifically, managing all of our diet restrictions away from home (Lily (Celiac) is gluten and dairy free and Lukas (ADHD) is gluten, dairy, egg and refined sugar free), the kids and I had a great time. In the past 3 years, we have been to Philadelphia over 50 times and this was the first time we have ever had the opportunity to really experience Philadelphia. We had a blast doing it.

Two weeks after we arrived, we were given the green light to go home and, yep, you guessed it, return two weeks later. And we have lived our lives in two week intervals ever since (But don't worry, this isn't really anything new. Remember how I said we've been to Philadelphia 50+ times in the past 3 years?)!

Our most recent adventure in Philadelphia (some of you may notice a familiar face. . .that amazing smile belongs to Aaron Nalle, recently rescued from an institution in Ukraine, now changing lives with his incredible spirit and fantastic smile!)

Don't worry, our trips to Philadelphia aren't the only things keeping us busy. During the past 3 months we have also had 9000 other doctors appointments (closer to home, thank goodness), Richard has been on 5 business trips and is still in school part time, and Alexis fractured her arm during one of our rare three week breaks (Daddy+6 kids on a trampoline=not a happy ending).

Now, lest you think that the past 3+ months have been all trials and no smiles, let me assure you that we have had much cause to celebrate as well.

On March 13th, Lily celebrated her 8th birthday. This was her first birthday in our family and she loved it so much she is STILL talking about it!! She has also started attending school part time, and, after the initial adjustment, she is loving it (many more details to come on this subject later).


On April 28th, Alayna celebrated her 9th birthday. Unfortunately, we had to spend her birthday in the car driving to Philadelphia, but before we hit the road, we were able to start our day with gifts and a breakfast of double chocolate cupcakes. But the celebration didn't end there. The staff at the Ronald McDonald House of Southern New Jersey was waiting for her with a huge stack of birthday presents when we arrived that evening AND, when we returned home, she was able to celebrate her birthday again with her Nana (who she just happens to share a birthday and her love of all things chocolate with)!

Alayna and Nana celebrating life and chocolate!

Perhaps one of the most exciting developments of the past 3 months however, is that. . . . .EVAN IS WALKING!!!! That's right folks, Evan is on the move! In his own words, he is a "walking machine!"

A trio of "walking machines"! So proud of my incredible kids and all that they have overcome!

He finally received his new braces (KAFO's) in mid-February and he has been up on his feet ever since! He still needs to use his walker for support, BUT, just a few days ago he took his first completely independent steps! I have a feeling he'll be running circles around us all very soon! And to think that we were told (many times) that he would NEVER walk! Doctors! What do they know!?

Obviously I am leaving out a lot of details, but this IS the Reader's Digest version. I do intend to go back and fill in the blanks on many of our recent adventures because I do feel that it is important to share the things that we have learned and experienced over the past few months. It has been exhausting, stressful and, at times, downright overwhelming, but these experiences have also been the most rewarding experiences of my life and I have learned and grown so much.

The following slideshow is the Readers Digest version of the past 4 months in pictures. The song ("Falling Into You" by Caleb Rowden), aside from being one of my current favorites, serves to remind ME why I do what I do. "For ye are bought with a price: therefore, glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's" (1 Corinthians 6:20). My Savior ransomed me with His life and with His blood and so I give my life to Him by answering His call to love and serve the children that He has and will yet entrust to me. It is the most challenging thing I have ever done. It is the most worthwhile thing I will ever do. It is for Him.