In just a few hours, in a courtroom in Sofia, Bulgaria, the judge who has been assigned to our case will deliver her ruling.
This will be the first time that I have not been present during the decision-making process. This will be the first time that I have no say in the proceedings, the first time that I will not be there to explain why we long to make these beautiful little girls a part of our family, to explain to the judge just how much potential they possess and just how loved and cherished they already are and always will be. How I long to be in that courtroom to be a voice for my beautiful little girls. Although we will not be there for the proceedings, we have been blessed with an amazing attorney who knows our hearts and who cares for our girls just as deeply as we do. She WILL be a voice for our family and for our girls and, if it comes down to it, we know that she will fight for us. Still, the fact that the decision will be made while we are sleeping (yeah right!) over 5000 miles away has been difficult.
The judge will rule in one of three ways. She will either grant the adoptions (assuming the Social Services reports made it to court on time. . .at this point, we do not know), reschedule the hearing (assuming the reports did NOT make it to court on time) or she will deny our petition (this decision would be appealed). Despite the uncertainty, one thing is sure. Though we will not be there when the decision is made, we know that the Lord will. "I will go before thee and make the crooked places straight; I will break in pieces the gates of brass, and cut in sunder the bars of iron" (Isaiah 45:2).
As I go to bed tonight I am at peace because I know that the Lord is guiding this process and that He will go before us and make the crooked places straight. I am ready to heed the admonition, "Be still and know that I am God" (Psalms 46:10) and trust that, whatever the outcome of this hearing, all will be well because the Lord is in control.